


bad days

by JaeRianL



Category: Torchwood
Genre: 4+1, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Fluff, Fluff, Gen, Light Angst, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Team as Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-10
Updated: 2020-06-10
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:29:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24650833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JaeRianL/pseuds/JaeRianL
Summary: The four ways in which Ianto helped his team deal with their bad days, and the ways they help him with his.
Relationships: Gwen Cooper & Ianto Jones, Gwen Cooper & Jack Harkness & Owen Harper & Ianto Jones & Toshiko Sato, Ianto Jones & Toshiko Sato, Jack Harkness/Ianto Jones, Mentioned Gwen Cooper/Rhys Williams, Owen Harper & Ianto Jones
Comments: 11
Kudos: 92





	bad days

**Author's Note:**

> Hey all, I hope you enjoy my fic! This doesn't address any particular canon episodes, but features elements of backstory discovered from Cyberwoman and Fragments - I personally chose to ignore canon and Owen isn't dead. I have tried to represent the referenced mental health issues as best as I could, however I have not gone into detail, mainly for my own mental health, so I apologise if you don't feel it is totally representative.
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy!

Torchwood Three had always been an intensive workplace, they lacked the necessary support from the likes of UNIT, as well as Torchwood London, which often meant that the staff suffered as a result. With an amalgamation of grief, trauma, and mental illnesses prevalent in the team, it was no wonder that they all dealt with their fair share of bad days. Of course, as with the self-destructive nature of all Torchwood employees, this meant that without the input of various individuals (namely Ianto), the Hub could very easily self-implode as a result. 

Ianto had spent enough time attempting to fade away into the background to pick up on his colleagues’ habits and behaviour to work out when a bad day was brewing. He knew that while he was no one special, he was probably the only one who knew how to fully deescalate a bad day, so that he would be the only one to get the brunt of it all, rather than the others. It had taken some trial and error, but Ianto had a system for each and everyone of his coworkers’ bad days, taking into account every potential outcome that could, and would, arise.

_Gwen_

Gwen’s bad days were a nightmare. She didn’t have nearly the same number of traumas as the rest of the team, and as a result her bad days often stemmed from Rhys being pissed at her for being unnecessarily secretive, or because something happened in the field that she didn’t agree with. She acted, for lack of a better description, like a stroppy teenager, and it was a testament to Ianto’s patience that he hadn’t throttled her when she started acting like that. However Ianto had checked the staff manuals, repeatedly, and apparently that could be classed as treason, so he abstained. 

Whenever Gwen was having a bad day, it was evident from the moment she stepped into the Hub. She’d fling her things about without a care, she’d scowl at everyone, and she would huff at every perceived slight which occurred. So Ianto made sure she had a steady stream of coffee and sweets throughout the day, and would more often than not divert her attention to him if she seemed to get more annoyed with the others. And when her annoyance grew to fury, he always made sure there was ample ammunition in the gun range, and that the gym was clean and tidy. 

However, it was often her verbal barbs that smarted the most, because it was days like these that Gwen’s minimal brain-to-mouth filter disintegrated into absolute nothingness. She was openly dismissive of Ianto’s help and importance - not that it bothered him - she insulted their humanity repeatedly, she made snarky comments about Tosh’s interests and she implied that Owen was less than competent (in every way imaginable) on more than one occasion. So, for the best interest of the entire team, Ianto often would do something he knew would annoy her - nag her about cleanliness, spend just a second too long around Jack, bring her coffee with no sugar - just so she would lay off of the others. He was sure Tosh had caught on to what he was doing, but the woman was often too hesitant to express her own opinions, and thus left Ianto to his duties with a thankful look when she could.

And, when it was time for them to leave, Ianto would message Rhys, warning the man about his partner’s emotional state. While he wasn’t supposed to know about Gwen working at Torchwood, Ianto had seen enough relationships implode due to the all consuming mess that is Torchwood, and had taken the executive decision to keep the man in the loop. The friendship which had bloomed as a result of their interactions was simply a welcome surprise for both men. 

Thankfully for everyone, these hellish days never lasted longer than that, she would often calm down within hours after the issue had been officially resolved. And everyone was more than grateful for that, even Jack had taken to hiding in his office when Hurricane Gwen was in one of her moods. And so what if Ianto ended most of those days with a stress headache, if there was one thing Ianto was good at, it’s ignoring any and every potential distraction in his life.

_Owen_

Owen is predictable. His usual demeanour of being a miserable sod is nothing unusual, from the first day Ianto had started working in Cardiff, he’d recognised the mask of a fellow mourner. The Welshman had taken it upon himself to collate dossiers about the lives of all his coworkers, and thus noted down the key dates and elements of Owen’s life which would inevitably trigger him. Because work never got to Owen, not in the way it got to Gwen and Jack, of course he felt the losses, his attack on Ed Morgan is a prime example of that, but it never triggered his bad days, because the chance of it replicating his past traumas was next to impossible.

So Ianto ensured that they were selective. Due to Jack’s inability to check his emails, Ianto often trawled through the endless messages from UNIT, and ensured that cases which resembled her death were never going to be brought up - on one occasion Ianto had told the Brigadier to go fuck himself for insisting on Owen’s “expertise” on the subject. And when they couldn’t avoid it, Ianto made it his life’s mission to avoid each and every trigger.

Because he’d seen what happened when Jack had triggered the medic, unintentionally blundering through a case involving an alien parasite. Although Owen had made it through the case, it was the after effects that had reassured Ianto that he was right in this interference. The moment he thought that he was alone, sitting hidden away in the medical bay, the man had sobbed his heart out, falling deeper into a state of overwhelming anxiety and despair. Thankfully, Ianto had come across Owen before he managed to make himself sick, and had held the medic until he had calmed himself down. The pair had stayed next to one another, curled up on the floor as they spoke about their lost lovers, bonding in a way that very few others could relate to. 

So, Ianto reckoned that it was justified that he was protective of the snarky medic. He ensured that whenever there was a significant date, Owen would be distracted with sufficient amount of work, either in the cold storage, or in the medical bay, far away from everyone else. And if the man ever needed space or time alone, Ianto was sure to leave him be in the archives, providing him with snacks and drinks throughout the day, knowing that he wouldn’t do it himself. However, unlike when Ianto deals with Gwen, it doesn't stop at the end of the working day, because once Jack has dismissed them all, Ianto drags Owen back to his flat, ignoring all of the complaints and half-hearted insults sent his way.

The evenings are often spent with Owen fluctuating between drinking and reminiscing, and cursing and screaming, with Ianto watching him to ensure he doesn’t do anything stupid. On numerous occasions, the younger man has had to barricade his front door in order to stop Owen from going out and indulging in the worst of the self-destructive habits he’d taken on over the years. But, for the safety and sanity of his friend, it was all worth it.

_Tosh_

Tosh was by far the easiest to help on her worse days, the ones where she’d feel isolated and claustrophobic just like when she was in the UNIT prison, because she never tried to hide it. Ianto always knew from the moment she came into work, choosing to use the tourism office entrance as opposed to the staff car park or the lift. Upon seeing her, he’d walk down to the Hub with her, under the guise of needing to top up on coffee, maintaining a mainly one-sided conversation as they made their way through the dingy corridors. 

From then on, Ianto would ensure that Tosh was never left alone throughout the day - the CCTV system was linked up to his PDA so he monitored it frequently - and would bring her out with him to grab lunch and dinner, so that she didn’t become consumed with the four walls of the Hub. Often on these days, Ianto would also rope Owen into helping distract Tosh, encouraging the medic to talk as loudly as he liked - with the help of excessive amounts of sugar when necessary - on the off chance he had to leave and thus couldn’t be there to help. 

And for the most part, it worked. Normally, she would come out of her shell over the day, and by the time Jack sent them all home, Tosh no longer needed the reassurance of those around her to remind her she wasn’t in that prison, and if she needed that reassurance for a few hours longer, Ianto was more than happy to have his closest friend over for a night in. However, there were days, where for whatever reason, her feelings couldn’t be helped with human interaction alone. Where Tosh would end up having flashbacks, or anxiety attacks, or dissociative episodes.

Now, Ianto was no psychologist, but if there was one thing he was good at, it was research. So, the first time he’d seen Tosh sat frozen at her computer, tears silently streaming down her face as she stared at the screen, Ianto had sprung into action, taking her away to his office to try and calm her down away from the chaos of the Hub. And when she’d finally calmed down, and explained what had happened - and how normally she “sucked it up and dealt with it” - Ianto knew he had to figure out what was the best course of action to help her.

So he had scoured the internet, the libraries, every resource he could find, so that he could help her through it all. He acted as a calming presence for her whenever she needed it, and he would stay with her overnight to ensure that she didn’t end up getting hurt during these episodes. Although she consistently apologised for her needing his support and help, he never held it against her, or begrudged her for it, it was his duty, as both a colleague and as a friend.

_Jack_

Jack is, and forever will be, complicated. He has lived a multitude of lifetimes, of which Ianto had only begun to scratch the surface of. However there were things Ianto was certain of: Jack had an enormous inferiority complex (thanks to the Doctor), he’d been held captive and tortured repeatedly during his lifetime, presumably including repeated deaths, and he held every slight close to him. He was a forgiving man, Ianto couldn’t understand why but he was, but that often meant he felt as though his feelings were invalid.

So, bad days for Jack could vary immensely. There were of course the days when someone was injured, and he would work himself to the bone so that he could atone for their pain, but you also had the days where flashbacks ran rampant in his mind, and he was left paralysed with fear, as well as the days where he could barely leave his bed for more than going to the toilet. As such, Ianto took varying approaches to his lover’s needs, and looked at it on a more day-to-day basis, rather than a preplanned system.

However, Ianto always attempted to remain as consistent as humanly possible, ensuring that he was always nearby in case Jack needed him, and even took to working in his office with the Captain so that he could be a visual reference his partner could rely on. Touch was also something Ianto ensured Jack had in spades, from what he could tell from the various nightmares and discussions they’d had, the immortal man had been tortured by enemies and lovers alike with banning loving contact of any kind. So, if Jack was clingier than normal, Ianto simply reciprocated with touch that was firmer than normal, leaving a hand of his free for this partner to use to ground himself when needed.

Because if there was one thing that Jack is, it’s deserving. Deserving of happiness, of comfort, of love and adoration. He is a man, living amongst a civilisation three thousand years from his home, his mother tongue is yet to exist, his family are mere fragments of distant memories that fade further and further away every day. And Ianto knew, he just knew, that even if his time would be short lived in his lover’s lifetime, he would strive to be one of the lucky few who got to see Jack Harkness for who he really was, for as long as that may be. 

That isn’t to say there were never times that Jack lashed out and genuinely hurt Ianto, nor times when Ianto unintentionally triggered his partner. But they worked through it, because they both knew that getting caught up on all the bad days, with what little time they would share of Jack’s life, was never worth it. Because that’s all they were, days. It was never the whole time, never their entire relationship, so why would they give up on one another over these moments.

And every night, when they curled up with one another in bed, Ianto made sure he reassured Jack that he loved the man, that he would never leave him, and that they would be together for as long Ianto lived, regardless of past traumas. Because the man was no infallible superhero, just a regular person who had loved, hurt and lost like everyone else, he just chose to wear his masks for longer than the typical, mortal human would. And it was worth it, to see a true smile, to hear his mother tongue, to see those walls fall down around the one he truly loved.

_Ianto_

Stubbornness is Ianto’s specialty. He’d been taught from a young age that his issues would burden those around him, his mother too ill, his father too drunk, and his sister too absent to cope with them. As a result, he’d kept everything down, and hid his issues on a day to day basis. Surviving his childhood, not to mention Torchwood, had provoked a multitude of issues that would make a psychiatrist’s day trying to understand and fully get to the root of. This stubbornness often translated into Ianto’s own bad days being helped hours after they’d started, however the team had worked to help him in whichever ways they knew how to. 

For Gwen, this often meant avoiding the younger man, and completing whatever work he asked of her. Due to her lack of understanding about his past, not to mention her ability to blunder into situations without thinking, she never found out the reasoning behind his bad days, but would work, in her own way, to make the days run smoothly. One thing she did notice, however, was the number of migraines he faced, from what Ianto presumed was a culmination of stress, anxiety, and head traumas from Torchwood and his childhood, and how they would render him virtually immobile in his office in the archives. As a result, she would often bring him down the alien strength painkillers, and would refrain from asking for his support unless it was dire.

In Owen’s case, he took a leaf out of Ianto’s book and helped avoid his friend’s triggers, ensuring that he never forgot the important dates in Ianto’s life. The medic couldn’t help but see himself in the younger man, and god did it terrify him at times, because he never would have wished that on his worst enemy, let alone the man he considered to be his brother. So, on the anniversaries, Owen would let Ianto go through his work day, hidden away in the archives, checking in every now and then to ensure he would eat during the day, and in the evenings, he would drag Ianto away from the Hub, often with an approving nod from Jack. The pair would go to Owen’s flat, and they would talk, about shitty parents, about lost lovers, about anything and everything, and eventually, they’d end the nights watching Disney films, often falling asleep on the sofa next to one another, just a man caring for his younger brother. 

Tosh was the first person to find Ianto during a flashback, the team had been led to a group of drunken men trying to set a Weevil alight. She could never be sure which element had triggered him first, but whichever it was had sent him running, causing Tosh to run after him, letting Jack know on the comms as she tried to find her friend. It hadn’t taken her long, he’d taken to hiding in an alley behind an industrial rubbish bin. Without hesitation, she’d set about pulling him back to the present, holding onto the normally unflappable Welshman as he sobbed in her arms. After the first flashback, it had been an unspoken rule amongst the team that Tosh would be the main person to help him through them, knowing that Ianto hated feeling weak around all of them, but less so around Tosh.

Jack never failed to shock the archivist. While Ianto knew that their relationship was serious - he’d practically managed to move Jack out of the Hub and into his flat after all - he half expected Jack to ignore his bad days like every other partner he’d had did (and God, was Jack tempted to kill all of those who had wronged his sweet Ianto in that way). But he never did, in fact, oftentimes Jack knew a bad day was brewing long before Ianto, and as a result, took it upon himself to help him whenever he could. He would offer Ianto reassurance, whether that be about their relationship, about his safety or about the safety of his friends, and never once did he make Ianto feel as though he was a burden. He would hold Ianto close, offer gentle kisses and affection that never led to anything more than he could give, and never took more than what his lover could offer. Because he knew Jones, Ianto Jones was going to be one of his greatest loves, he had since the night they first met, and he would be damned if these bad days tried to destroy the source of his happiness.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you all enjoyed! Let me know what you thought & come find me on [ Tumblr](https://acetoshikosato.tumblr.com/)! Thanks for reading!!
> 
> Jae <3


End file.
